Boobie or Baby?

The girls recently invented a game where one will point to (or grab) a buldge on my body and the other will exclaim whether it is a boobie or a baby. Then they switch. Sometimes they try to trip each other up and say boobie when they mean baby. Sometimes I play too.

The Sunday that everything fell apart

So is there like some cardinal rule of parenting - or at least twin parenting - that just when you think you've got control of something, everything falls apart?

Did I say something about potty training going "better than expected?" Did I dare to think that we have had some decent nights of sleep over the past couple weeks? Well, I must have been tempting fate. Our Sunday looked like this:

-Ilana's night wakenings are back. The morning at our house started at 4:34 a.m.

-After several unsuccessful potty attempts at home and Starbucks, Ilana ended up pooping in her pants, at the park.

-Then she went down the slide.

-After the park, Orli completely melted down at a family brunch. By melted down, I mean screaming and crying "HOME, HOME, HOME" until we left.

-Once home, the girls refused to nap.

-After an over an hour of crying, Ilana ended up clocking in one hour and Orli had zero nap.

-Outside of our friends' place in the city, Ilana pooped in her pants for a second time.

-We only had 2 wipes left.

-Just before we got into the car, Orli spilled orange juice all over herself and Darin.

-Once home, Orli pooped in her pants.

I think that about covers it. Oh, and our new pool had a hole in it so Darin had to get a new one.


left: the new froggie pool
below: a moment of cuteness occuring halfway between the poop in the city and the poop in the burbs.

The Potty Continued

With his summer school job complete, Darin is now home with the girls for the next month or so. Wednesday he took the girls shopping to find a new potty seat for "the big potty." The girls are completely obsessed with this new Elmo one. Ilana loves to climb up on it and sing "la la la, la la la, Elmo's World" and after flushing Orli waves and says "bye, bye, Elmo."

Overall, potty training has gone much better than expected.The girls are out of diapers all day long except for naps and bedtime. There are occasional accidents (usually in the park) but for the most part, the girls really get it.

The girls love love love their cousin Ami. This past weekend he and Uncle Dan came over to play. The kids spent most of the time running up and down the halls with doll strollers screaming.

Then they all took a bath together. It was perhaps the cutest bath of all time.

Pool

After a few 90 degree days last week we bought a pool with a little slide. The girls seemed to love it though, more than swimming, they were into filling up their watering cans and dumping the water out.

The new pool gave us (Darin) incentive to cut the grass in the back yard which had grown to gargantuan lengths. It also served as a nice feet cooler-downer for my large, pregnant self.

Night Out

In an attempt to have a night out to myself and make new suburban friends, I accompanied a sister of a friend to a newly formed young women's Hadassah group. Hadassah is a Zionist women's fundraising organization that supports hospitals, health care and other initiatives in Israel. I don't know too much about the organization other than that, but I have heard that women get together in these chapters and it can be a source of socialization for these ladies.

It was a dessert/recipe exchange - bring your favorite dessert and copies of the recipe to share. I brought copies of my mom's carrot cake recipe and a bowl of fruit salad since it was too hot to bake. I got a few weird looks at first, but the fruit got devoured.

Being some who has fundraised for a few years now - it was a little painful for me to be there as it was clear that no one was really comfortable asking for money. But worse, they also didn't really talk about the organization and where the dollars go.

They spent more time talking about the upcoming meetings which will include painting pottery and Pampered Chef. That was even more painful for me.

After making a joke about my Monday nights being cleared up now that The Bachelorette is over (well, half joke, half real), I managed to move the group conversation to my favorite topic - reality TV - which made me really happy.

Versailles Part II

Ok, here we go. ..

A few more couples had entered the dining room - very dressed up and very Russian.

Then our first course of food came. Now here is a slice of my family. My dad and aunt ordered mushroom soup - actually very delicious - with the intent of sharing with the whole table. And we did. My uncle had ordered Vinaigrette - which is like a cold beet chopped salad. They brought him a bowl of hot borscht. We all stared silently as it was placed in front of him. Once the wait staff left, he started eating it. I wondered aloud if I had heard his order wrong. He paused and concluded that he probably should have ordered the borscht anyway. It was pretty tasty. We all took a spoon.

My aunt ordered these crazy - crazy - carrots. They were raw strips of carrots mixed with a lot of chopped garlic. Like so much garlic that it hurt to eat. We all took a taste. We all squirmed as the bite hit us hard and then went for more. We concluded that we would all be healthier if we had more garlic in our lives.


I brought the carrot leftovers home and Darin made me toss them because, even in a sealed container in the fridge, they made our entire house smell like a garlic factory.

Now luckily this whole time in the restaurant I was sitting with my back to the rest of the room. This way I could control my mortification as more people filed in. By now a very large man in a suit and a woman in a backless dress came in and starting greeting the others. Then I noticed that the others were all carrying gifts. Slowly more guests were filing in and taking their seats in of the four long tables.

I thought I had figured out what was happening. "Maybe a rehearsal dinner?" I asked my mom.

"Probably a wedding reception."

WHAATT?? a WEDDING? We were crashing these random Russians' private wedding reception?? And we were trapped in the far back of the room?

Sure enough, just after we got our main dishes, another large man came on to the dance floor with a mic. He introduced himself in half English, half Russian. Then he gave his toast.


"When I think of Nicolas and Natasha" (by the way I just made up those names - I honestly can't remember them but please bare with me)

"When I think of Nicolas and Natasha...." My dad who was sitting next to me grunted and turned his chair all the way around for a better view. I almost died. I stared at the mushroom soup.

"...only word word comes to mind. " Long dramatic pause. "Gorka!"

The crowd cheered. "GORKA!"And everyone drank. End of toast. I asked my family what gorka means and my mom and uncle just laughed. "It means...Gorka." My dad applauded with the rest of the wedding guests. I buried my head in my water.


Now the waiters approached the wall directly behind our table and pulled down a screen. A SCREEN? Somewhere a projector was turned on and what might as well have been Russian MTV started on the screen. Like Hip Hop, half naked Russian women MTV. The music kicked in pretty loud. My mom, uncle and aunt turned their chairs around for better view.

The waiter asked if we wanted dessert. Somehow we got onto the topic of Buffalo Grove with him and he proudly announced that BG has the 2nd largest concentration of Russians outside of Moscow - or something like that - and is also the 2nd largest drunk driving town. I don't really think that either of those statements have been verified but still can't believe how proud he was of his "facts."

I was ready to bolt when my aunt ordered what sounded like a really good dessert and five spoons. I also noticed that in the meantime people were up on the stage setting something up. Before I could decide whether I would regret staying to satisfy my cravings, MTV came down and the curtains opened to a live band. Well a man with a key board synthesiser and a woman with a mic. A familiar beat began and so did she.

"Heat me baby won more time."


I almost died. Again. The dance floor started to fill up and the disco ball lit up. Our dessert came and I couldn't resist a few bites. By now it was close to 10 p.m. and I really needed to go. There was no graceful way out so I cut across the whole dance floor, nearly knocking over the group of five (I'm guessing) single ladies dancing in a circle. In the parking lot I ran into the bride and groom who were smoking with about 50% of their guests, the hostess and the old woman in sequins.